The best, most influential tweets in Twitter history. Twitter is like a drug: addictive, poorly regulated, responsible for dazzling highs and rock- bottom lows. But right now, at this moment, let's forget all the trolls, mansplainers, Nazis and sitting U. S. presidents who make the platform a living hell on a daily basis. Instead, we will come together and celebrate the life of tweets that — in one way or another — have attained canonical status. Some of these are funny, some are thought- provoking and some are flat- out stupid.

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We could spend months arguing which are which. What really matters is that every single one reveals the crucial truth of how we think and speak in the age of 1. Study them. Recite them. Accept them as your gospel.

Understand that this is in no way a ranking; I love all my children equally. Former member of U. K. Parliament Ed Balls can't be the only person to accidentally tweet his own name while attempting to search what people were saying about him on Twitter, but he's the only one with the last name Balls. A tweet so good that the Paris Review had to actually review Paris. Twitter has shown a surprising facility for snippets of script- like dialogue, and if you can use that format to make fun of Star Wars, so much the better. 5. Narrative at its finest: no thread, no explanations, just one indelible image spun from a few choice details. Hemingway would've wept for such perfection.

With "four eels," @JNalv set the high- water mark for all Twitter lyric parodies. The true measure of an alternate- song- lyrics tweet, as with the pop song it riffs on, is how well it sticks in your head. This one comes with a lifetime guarantee. It is categorically impossible to choose the best tweet from the mysterious @dril, who could have easily taken up 2. Yet his masterful vision of what it means to be "owned" in web discourse is perhaps most essential to our understanding of Twitter. All you need to know about our culture of clickbait and backlash. RIP my mentions" was, for way too long, a stock phrase used by people pretending to enjoy the negative replies to their very bad tweets.

Now it is dead and buried forever, and the rest of us can get on with living. 1. One of the few lyrics tweets that could hope to compare with "four eels." 1. Before she became the reluctant first lady of the United States, Melania Trump spent her days trying to mind- meld with photos of large marine mammals. Now we try to understand what's going through her head. A non- sequitur for the ages. It's Britney, bitch.

We all have our personal internet quirks; the revelation that our own devices know them better than anyone is at once sobering and liberating. Watch Bon Jovi: When We Were Beautiful Online. Plus, it's your karmic duty to share any photo that makes you laugh uncontrollably. The way [someone] looks at [someone/something]" is a standard Twitter formulation at this point, but no other instance will ever be this pure. 1.

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Twitter has seen some legendary roasts over the years, and your favorite is bound to be a matter of taste. But where many of the funniest take on the proportions of a dog- pile or avalanche — with multiple users burying the victim under a slew of abuse — this rogue insult is a K. O. all by itself. Which is more compelling here: that 5.

Cent would soon be bankrupt, or that he wouldn't do a simple favor for his poor grandmother, instead publicly complaining and abandoning her along with the trash? If everyone who knew how to use Photoshop was using it for jokes like this, Twitter would be a far happier place.

Also, a nice subversion of casual misogyny. 2. A pop- culture reference that's funny only because it's 1. This could well be the only good brand tweet.

If you can read this without saying "Emma Stone" out loud, you're not human. Watch Psychosis Online Movies24free. The vulnerability of the look, the shock twist of the caption, the bland loneliness of the cafeteria setting — yep, it's the all- time greatest selfie. It was 2. 01. 1. There were definitely other usernames left. Plato's Republic meets World. Star. Hip. Hop. What more could you want? This tweet came too late to establish the meme- universe Joe Biden we came to know in the course of his vice presidency.

The Onion can take most of the credit.) But that caricature of Biden was most purely expressed in this tweet. 2. On a social media platform where everyone is constantly wondering if the world is about to end, this is by far the most plausible post- apocalypse. 2. Angry conservatives love to post self- owns. Mark knows how it's done. 2. We don't have time to get into the tangled history of @Horse_ebooks' evolution as a novelty account.

Fortunately, this amazing koan — which, like all their best, sounds half- human, half- spambot — speaks for itself. A masterpiece of missing context. Then we found out that Cher was furnishing bare classrooms in the third world, which made this even better. Before he rage- quit altogether, Kanye West had a beautiful talent for compressing the sum total of all the overconfidence and pretension found on Twitter into a singular voice of hilariously unchecked ego. We miss you, man. 3. Twitter is definitely a place for the realizations of stoned 1. Apparently this was soccer- related, but when you're as widely despised as Piers Morgan, you can't bring up the subject of your death without causing celebration.

More importantly, however, this attitude is — in the words of writer Alex Pareene — "always appropriate and always welcome" on Twitter. Each time someone retweets this onto our timeline, for whatever reason, we relive the joy of being alive only to wish for the sweet embrace of the grave. The headline is brilliant enough, but the superhero- like solemnity of the punchline could power the next dozen Batman sequels alone.

The saga of @dog_rates, an account that originally charmed with its enthusiasm for cute photos of canines but morphed into a depressing business venture and alienated both the pro- and anti- Planned Parenthood crowds, is a lesson in craven choices: Absolute virality corrupts absolutely. But for a moment there, its author seemed to know the sanctity of loving dogs for the dogs' sake.

Anyway, here's the most important tweet invoking the 1. Oasis single "Wonderwall," perhaps the most memeable song in music history.

This appears to be the moment that we all started using the "extremely [descriptor] voice" frame in our tweets, efficiently converting our written words into an aural experience — and, by necessity, a collaborative one. There's a proud Twitter tradition of mistyping and mangling words until their inherent meaninglessness is laid bare. With "Pepsi" being the mutated word in this example, we also get a delightful gloss on the hollow language of capitalism, a destabilizing system in which arbitrary sound is valued over information. Bet you didn't know Pepsi was originally called "Brad's Drink." 4. A fascinating glimpse into how corporations see their customers in the digital age: as a gigantic focus group eager to define themselves through products. An essential trope of all online interaction is the Horny Guy Who Sucks at Flirting but Won't Stop.

He should be as pretentious as he is ignorant. You can yell at the haters all you want, but living well is the best revenge.

A celebrity humblebrag elevated by an outstanding hashtag. Nothing says "dangerous rebel" like an aged rock star who shows up for his court date and asks his lawyer to snap a pic of him flipping the bird in the hall.

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