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The Movie Cliches List, part 1. Piston- engine airplanes in the movies are unusually subject to engine. This failure mode is unique to filmdom - engine coughs, keeps. Hero doesn't notice. Then it stutters, catches again. Hero. notices, taps gas gauge, turns lever.

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Then it stutters exactly three. No further efforts. Only men are alcoholics. Any hopeless alcoholic can quit drinking when. The instant the alcoholic stops.

If there is more than one or two of an alien race, they are always. Aliens usually speak english and have same colloquialisms. All members of alien species wear the same outfits, including clothing.

This makes them readily identifiable. Aliens. who do not dress like aliens are hiding something. This may, in fact, be a consequence of the fact that aliens all have. Bad guys will always get killed by a snake, while the hero simply. In addition, he will. Deadly reptiles will always attack a woman first, even if she's in the. Dogs always know who's bad, and bark at them.

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If the hero listens to his answering machine and one important message. Here'a John! I see you. This is Sallieeeeee! I'll call again. later." ..

Ahhhh! The killer is ...". If. however the message is expected be sure that it will be the first one on the tape. Here are the fundamental principles of movie asteroid science, as derived. NBC miniseries "Asteroid": Asteroids travel through space making a noise like a powerful but. Asteroids are usually locked into orbits, but if a comet comes by.

It's only the fact that everything is locked into an orbit which. Any asteroid that gets loose.

Earth within a matter of hours. It's just barely possible to evacuate Kansas City to a distance of. This requires lots of airplanes. It also. requires martial law, so that "looters will be arrested on sight".

Have they no mercy?) With 3. A mile- wide asteroid can mostly burn up in the atmosphere, causing it. A river from a burst dam can exactly keep pace with a pickup truck for. It will then obligingly pause as the pickup truck. When a raging river washes over a pickup truck on a bridge, the bridge. A four- mile- wide nickel asteroid (which would mass about a *trillion*. But with only two airplane- mounted lasers, it instead instantly.

Astronomers are very surprised. Laser beams are easily visible in space. Incoming asteroids spend several minutes in Earth's atmosphere. Asteroids made of softer or more volatile stuff than nickel will. Asteroids that land in the ocean will do no damage regardless of size. Asteroids are discovered by astronomers peering directly through. Whatever they see.

Asteroid positions are reported in plainly audible 7. BPS Baudot. teletype signals.

Oddly, there will be no dog to be rescued at the last possible moment. Maybe only tornadoes and volcanoes come equipped with dogs. Would. you settle for goldfish? Every time some guy walks into a bar, usually the hero, he gets into a.

Usually right under a BUDWEISER sign (see "product placement"). Likelihood of fight increases if country music is playing in the background. Movie heroes in a bar will either order strong alcoholic drinks and. The latter will. always provoke sarcastic remarks and a fight will ensue. When men drink whiskey, it is always in a shot glass, and they always. If they are wimps, they will gasp for air, then. If they are macho, they will wince briefly.

A cup of black coffee/splash of cold water in face is enough to render. Peter's Friends."). Whenever someone looks through the binoculars, you see two joined.

Glasses never collect moisture when you come in from the cold outside. Computer geeks and "intelligent" persons use them, action heros never. A villain will always commit murder right in front of the window when. People are often exact duplicates of remote ancestors, or of their. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil. Radiation causes mutation not to your future children, but to you.

Mutation is never immediately fatal, but first either. Interbreeding is genetically possible with any person or creature from. Newborn babies can babble, crawl, and hold their heads steady.

People never cough, sneeze, blow their noses, or show any other. Only exception to the above is when they're dying. A cough is a. symptom of terminal illness.

Menstruation is an unknown phenomenon in movies. Female movie. characters are all immune from it. You can eat as much as you want in a film and you'll never EVER have to. Vomit is portrayed by distant toilet flush. Nobody ever throws- up on. Evil geniuses who devise bombs to destroy things/people always have.

Bombs always have big, blinking, beeping timer displays. Evil geniuses. who devise bombs to destroy things/people are always thoughtful enough to. LED) of how much time remains before. When you cut the wire to the detonator, the timer will stop. You will. not be able to do this, however, until only one second remains. All wires have different colors, so the hero can easily differentiate.

Bombs detonated with microwave ovens always explode 2 seconds after the. Under Siege"). Explosions always happen in slow motion. When an explosion occurs, make. A building that in real life would require several dozen carefully placed. Lethal Weapon III"). This bomb will cause no. Movie passengers either don't pay cabs at all, or have the exact change.

Same is true in restaurants. Checks are always designed to be 1.

Movie people can get cabs instantly, unless they are in danger. Movie characters driving in the city will get to park wherever they like. Watch Nine Miles Down Online Freeform there. When you are alone in the back seat of the car, make sure you sit in the. Sudden accelleration of a car (be it forwards, backwards, stopping. Be prepared. Each wheel is also fitted with a smoke device to.

Hollywood cars are also special: when. Pedestrians in Hollywood have the world's best reactions, so don't worry. Mr Pappodopolus is quite used to. There are always people carrying around large sheets of glass on the.

The person behind the wheel is talking to and looking at their passenger. When Harry Met Sally"). Cars chasing each other in the middle of a city will not suffer enough.

People being chased by a car will keep running down the middle. A car will always explode when shot at, unless the hero is driving it. When you drive a car, you can always recognize all the persons you know that. If someone has "fixed" the foot- brakes in the car, the driver never use.

Cars often end up on cliff- edges with 2 wheels in the open air. The. good guys are saved just before the car falls over, the bad guys join. When a car falls off a cliff after a car chase, it usually explodes.

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